You DUMPED a DOCTOR......What are you thinking?!

So a few years ago I was in a 2 year long relationship with a doctor. We will call him Dean. Dean was the perfect package. He was handsome, driven and what every woman would want which is a DOCTOR! Not only was Dean the perfect package our relationship had the illusion of being the perfect package as well. We looked great in pictures. I was good at pretending to be someone else around all his well to do medical school friends. Let me go into detail on this.

My mother says in this world there are 2 types of women.You have your Maryanne’s and your Victoria’s. Maryanne is the type of girl who has a closet full of Gap clothing and wears turtlenecks to bars. Maryanne’s have had a great upbringing and in most cases are the sheltered type. Maryanne’s went to college and made good grades.

 The Victoria’s of the world have an edge to them. There upbringing was probably less than stellar. They have a past. They may have more than 2 drinks at the bar. They may have done things in their past that society would consider "promiscuous". Victoria’s didn’t exactly follow the rules in life to fit a cookie cutter existence.

I would like to say maybe I am a mixture of both. However the group of doctors/medical students that Dean and I spent most of our time with were all the Maryanne’s of the world. I tried so hard to fit the mould. I dyed my hair brown and started shopping for more Ivy League type clothing. I would try to laugh at the jokes they would make but it was a forced laugh because these people were straight up NOT FUNNY! Not my type of funny anyway. When we would all go to a bar I would sneak outside and smoke a cigarette just to escape. I would try to hide my smoking from Dean but he knew. I would walk back in and all the Maryanne’s would be giving me go to hell looks and Dean would smell me and then look me up and down with a look of disgust and/or disappointment.

I seriously had to change who I was and really tone my personality down to be a part of the relationship. Not to mention I had to tone down my sex drive. Dean had a very low sex drive. So many nights I went to bed and he didn’t even touch me I would try to initiate sex with him and 9 times out of 10 I was turned down. Dean was a logical guy and I was and am a emotional and passionate person.

This went on for a couple of years and something in me snapped. I could not live a lie anymore. I could not keep pretending to be this person I was not just to be able to marry a doctor. I remember when people found out I broke up with Dean they had looks of shock and disappointment on their faces. People would even come right out and say "Why on earth would you dump him he is a doctor???!!!!"

When I pictured my future with a doctor. I saw lots of lonely nights ahead of me. I saw a sexless marriage. I saw having to hide who I really am to fit this perfect picture of what a doctors wife should be. Dean was a good man and honestly he treated me well but at the end of the day I knew he just wasn’t the one for me and I wasn’t the one for him. He needs to find himself a nice Maryanne
;-)